Work, Drink, Wake - repeat until skint
Well hello.
It's been roughly another fortnight since my last bit of crap chat. And what a way to follow it up with yet more. I seriously have nothing to tell you guys. I am now working full time, part time and casual in 3 different jobs in an effort to stem the flow of cash out of my uk bank accounts. So i'm now on for 7 days for the next few weeks before we head up the coast for about a month.
Working full time at a call centre called Insight - a quality place with loads of decent people. Rick and Dan from Glasgow (mates of Rod) managed to blag me a job. Turns out i'm not actually that bad at selling crap to Aussie people - they're actually pretty generous. I've been mainly selling raffle tickets to unsuspecting pensioners who don't know their arse from their elbow. Fantastic! By the way - you know all backpackers get taxed 30% over here?!?!!??! OUTRAGE! However, I have come across (?) some quality names doing some outbound sales calls at the call centre. Mr Shaveet Pantapopolous was one of my favourites. I was laughing so hard I had to hang up on him - shame!
Other jobs - basically pouring pints. Was working at Rosehill racecourse in the members arena. I have never seen so many good looking women, albeit dancing like total tits. Free drinks afterwards, which was nice - managed to miss the last train home and some random that I was supposedly working with gave me a lift home!
That really is all the chat I've got - I work, work then I work again. Sometimes it's 10 hours a day, sometimes 8, sometimes 6, sometimes 11, sometim - you get the idea. Still got some time for the odd few beers tho!
Obviously I don't have any photos on here since my camera broke and I can't afford to get a new one yet, so I will start to talk about a pal of mine from back home.
He told me he wanted a special mention on fizin, so Col - here you go. Colin is a lad back home who I've been best mates with for for the last 18 odd years. During that time period, he's spent about 17 of them sleeping. The other time, he sits and writes the funniest pish, and likes to dabble in a bit of Photoshop. Let me give you some examples.
Most of you will be familiar with the poet Philip Larkin. Ah the days of 5th year English. He is without doubt the worst poet I have ever heard of. If anyone reading this is from the Philip Larkin Society, I would love you to post something that you would regard as 'comical' on this site.
Anyhow - I'll now show you what I got in the mail from Col the other day... (warning - may contain offensive words and far too many private jokes)
INVESTIGATE by Colin Larkin
Dear Andrew, what can I say?
Your lots and lots of miles away
Been to Singapore, Thailand, Bombay
Now is Australia saying G-DAY
Fizin.com is really good
Write on it more, I know I would
More nude burds, you know you should
It would make me, hard as wood
How is Laura, is she home sick
She really is a smelly chick
Has she seen your elephant trick
She wouldn’t need a measuring stick!!
You’ve had so little s*x you must be mad
But with no diseases you must be glad
S*x with Aussie’s wouldn’t be bad
Unless they’re wearing a f*nny pad.
All that drinking will make you fat
You’ll be the one, they’ll all, laugh at
What u should do, is get your own flat
So you and Millar can make your own sc*t!
So what country are you off too next?
Let me know by sending a text
If you take off your top, be sure to flex
And u might be in for some oral s*x.
Right, that’s me, I’m on my way
I’ve simply got, no more to say
So pop a shrimp, on your Barbie
And FIRE THE GOLF BALL THAT WAY!!!!!!
Ok bye
You better reply
Wise guy
At Strath you may be given a PIE!!!!!
==========================
I'm sure there's a future in poetry for you Col, no doubts. Also, another field that Colin excells in is image editing - i'll be adding more of his stuff here when he sends some more, so keep a look out - there should be more than just one here by the end of the week...
You bored folk might remember that pic from somewhere - a mixture of a couple of them.
Managed to meet a lad from back home that Millar and I knew from HA's back home - big Dave Booth - working for Rolls Royce over here staying in a fecking palace in Coogee, not bad boss
Anyhow, for the next few weeks I'll be mainly working and waking up with semi's (what they call half-hangovers over here)
So I bid you all goodbye - as sure as Robert is your Dad's brother - I'll be adding stuff to this post over the next week or so - keep coming back and pressing Ctrl+F5 on your keyboard to keep updated.
Have fun you lot,
Mick.
M + P - Glad you enjoyed your break, don't worry about my finances - got it all covered!
Vick and Bro - You get the PC all fixed and stuff? Hope the weather over in Iran ain't too cold!
Bod - you managed to clean the house up b4 maw and paw got back?
BC - how was US? Tell us all about it in a mail
Col - Is above to your satisfaction?
Peek eh - nice one on the exams mate, get all the crap out of the way and I'll see you in LA!
Bobby - you get my mail about the drunk guys?
Loy and Steve - good luck in the exams lads - London Bay-bee!
Chazza - hello again, keep the texts coming
Caz - Hahaha another quality email, some excellent chat - love it!
Scotland Football and Rugby teams - You are a disgrace. Apart from the English game, not bad.
Emma - can't believe you lost all your photos - maybe some specialist could recover them for you - we all miss ya!
Richie, Glen, Kristy - Happy Birthday Kristy!! How's it going in NZ??
Ross, Phil - Where the hell are you??
Kimmy G - ah our chats are class. Indeed, quality! Miss ya
Laura D - heard you're starting an accountancy job! Niiice!
Dertoo - how are ya boss, mbaaahaaaaaaa
Faisal - nooooo i don't beleive it. Unreal. See you in Fiji where u can pass as a local!
Spreg and Rye - It still all good in US? Noooo pleeeeeeeeeeeassssseeeeeeee.
Everyone else back home - hope you're enjoying the weather - it actually rained here a few days ago. Ahhhh
